I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
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