Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
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