So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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