i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
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