my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize