And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
