I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
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Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
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