dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
