Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
We talked him into tasing himself.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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