I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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