i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
