Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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