we're blogging at a bar
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
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