She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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