you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
