I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
