it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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