The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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