dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college