Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
