I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
