told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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