he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
birth control should be required to get into college
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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