My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize