Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.