just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize