I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
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