im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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