How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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