Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid

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(215): So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling (215): on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid http://tfl.nu/4rn1

Replies (54) Good night (1964) Bad night (1326)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.

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(405): That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi. http://tfl.nu/2rin

Replies (15) Good night (898) Bad night (3688) Order T-Shirt
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(973): View more from New Jersey

we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had

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(973): we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had http://tfl.nu/lrsc

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(443): View more from Maryland

do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?

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(443): do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick? http://tfl.nu/6riv

Replies (46) Good night (3973) Bad night (1141) Order T-Shirt
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(303): View more from Colorado

I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff

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(303): I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff http://tfl.nu/0hbk

Replies (2) Good night (2742) Bad night (693) Order T-Shirt
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(410): View more from Maryland

There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go

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(410): There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go http://tfl.nu/lquj

Replies (1) Good night (2261) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
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(914): View more from New York

My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.

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(914): My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off. http://tfl.nu/9ogm

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(204): View more from Manitoba

I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary

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(204): I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary http://tfl.nu/rsxr

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(757): View more from Virginia

i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .

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(757): i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too . http://tfl.nu/0v5g

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(616): View more from Michigan

Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me

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(616): Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me http://tfl.nu/gcet

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.

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(610): Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun. http://tfl.nu/afxx

Replies (5) Good night (2121) Bad night (618) Order T-Shirt
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.

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(+44): I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs. http://tfl.nu/5p7v

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.

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(267): They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment. http://tfl.nu/jokz

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.

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(405): Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped. http://tfl.nu/kn7w

Replies (5) Good night (1205) Bad night (445)
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(707): View more from California

That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on

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(707): That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on http://tfl.nu/xdbh

Replies (1) Good night (1047) Bad night (337) Order T-Shirt

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