Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize