He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
please don't ironically join a cult
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