It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
