btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
