My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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