New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later