return my video game
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
did you just send me my own nude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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