I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
The ass gains better be worth it
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