So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
