This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
