Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.