I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Girls should come with a carfax report
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?