this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
operation have a gay friend backfired
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT