Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I've blown a few things in my day
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
