we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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