I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
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He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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