my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
