I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger