Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize