i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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