My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
