mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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