I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
